بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful

Effective Communication

by Irshad Mahmood - Director, Siraat-al-Mustaqeem Dawah Centre

Never Stop: Listening, Learning and Thinking.

Repeating and Reminding is a Key to success of Effective Communication

Don’t LOSE your TEMPER instead go for TABLE TALK with a Positive Attitude

Scholars had done their Best BUT they are NOT Allah and may do mistakes

Great Thanks to Great Scholars, who saved the Ummah and kept the Islaam Alive

Effective communication is important for living systems for power, control and survival. Without effective communication societies or systems cannot organize themselves or perform desired functions.

Living systems or societies are information processing units and information can only be communicated effectively if the communication channels are free from any disturbance or noise.

As an example: For transactions in banks, they need error free transactions, “NOT A SINGLE MISTAKE”.

Allah also points towards Effective Communication, we need to open our eyes little deeper from inside of our heart to understand it:

When the Quraan is read, listen to it with attention, and hold your peace: that you may receive mercy (otherwise may be not). [Al_Quraan_007.204]

(To get real Mercy of Allah, you must have to listen carefully in a (noise free environment) when the Quraan is read in a Group otherwise you may not get the real MERCY from Allah.

Some People might take time to understand an issue, while other may take very less time. The problem in taking time to understand an issue could be, the intellectuality levels or wrong pre-assumptions of the individual person.

Intellectuality level takes time, since there is no other solution than just to wait till the person acquires more knowledge. Remember a person takes around 20 years of age (time) to become a Professional Doctor. Every thing takes times.

Pre-assumptions take times, since it might have wrong pre-assumptions, which is Haraam. I would like to give an example here to make it more understandable:

Suppose you have Alcohol, which is Haraam, and Clean Water, which is Halaal and you, need to fill a glass with Clean Water. The problem could be that the glass might have filled up with Alcohol, so in order to fill the glass with clean water, you need to take out Alcohol completely and also rinse it properly. Even a single drop of Alcohol will make the glass of water Haraam. While it is very easy to fill an empty glass with clean water and takes very less time.

So in order to understand some of the logic, you might need to clean our heart with justice and truthfulness with Allah.

Be Careful when discussing the Ayaat of the Quraan, and be HONEST to Allah, otherwise it might put you into the category of Liars to Quraan, which is an Extremely Dangerous shirk. Instead of LOOSING your TEMPER go for TABLE TALK with a Positive Attitude. Always make Duaa that “If I am wrong, May Allah Correct Me. If You are Wrong, May Allah Correct You. If We both are wrong, May Allah Correct  both of Us. AMEEN.”

By Denying the Ayaat of Quraan, may cause you to fall in the category of looking for other Religion, so Be Careful:

O ye who believe! Whoso of you becomes a renegade from his religion, (know that in his stead) Allah will bring a people whom He loves and who love Him, humble toward believers, stern toward disbelievers, striving in the way of Allah and fearing not the blame of any blamer. Such is the grace of Allah, which He gives unto whom He will. Allah is All Embracing, All Knowing. [Al_Quraan_005.054]

Trying to Change the Ayaat of Quraan by Denying it, may cause you into the category of Liar to Quraan. Even Rasool Allah (Peace Be Upon Him) did NOT had Authority to change any of the Ayaat of Quraan, so Be Careful:

But when our Clear Signs are rehearsed unto them, those who rest not their hope on their meeting with Us, say: bring us reading other than this, or change this, say: it is NOT for me, of my own accord, to change it: I follow Naught but what is revealed unto me (as is): if I were to disobey my Lord, I should myself fear the Penalty of a great day (to come). Say: If Allah had to willed, I should not have rehearsed it to you, nor would he have made it known to you. A whole lifetime before this have I tarried amongst you: will ye not then understand? (Al_Quraan_010.015 – 016)

And recite (and teach) what has been revealed to thee of the Book of thy Lord: none can change his words, and none wilt thou find as a refuge other than him. (Al_Quraan_018.027)

For Speakers, Writers and Teachers or Instructors:

Dear Scholars,

You are great, doing very great job, BUT we are unable to understand you. May be your level of communication is very high; so it is not effective and you are fail to communicate the Great Message of Deen to us. If you really want to transfer your knowledge, below are my advise.

Advise to Scholars:

For an effective communication, Level, Language and Timing should be accurate. Perhaps, you need to come a little lower level, the level on which we listeners or readers are. May be you are using high-level language, so you need to speak in little lower level language. May be the timings are not appropriate and you need to wait little while (minutes, hours, days, weeks, months). May be you needed to repeat it several times.

If you are writing, try to use bold, color etc. to highlight your main points. Try to write short and effective few pages and one topic in your article. Keep in mind 95% people don’t have time to read your very long article.

If you are speakers and giving lectures, try to be specific, to the point, with few examples. Use variable tone, and keep asking small question like “did you understand or are you following me”. If your lecture may go more than an hour, give ten minutes break to the listener to digest it. Summarize it at the end.

Acknowledgement is an essential part of an Effective Communication. Acknowledgement cannot be completed without a session on Questions and Answers. You need to give appropriate time for Questions & Answers.

Never EVER Mention any Unislaamic Addresses, WEB Sights etc in Public. Report to Law and Order Enforcement Agencies (Police) if possible.

For Listeners, Readers and Students:

Dear Students,

May be, it is you, who is not co-operating and not trying to understand and wasting the costly time of great scholars. Try to understand how hard they are trying to explain, trying to explain at lowest level, in your lower level language and giving you enough time to think about it.

Advise to Students:

To be part of an effective communication, you need to be co-operative. You need to open your eyes from inside your heart, so that you can read effectively. You also need to open your ear from inside your heart, so that you can hear effectively. You may need to re-read or Listen again and again. Take your time to understand Deen, but don’t be too late that you miss the train of your life. No body knows when he will die.

Acknowledgement is an essential part of an Effective Communication. Acknowledgement cannot be completed without a session on Questions and Answers. You need to ask Questions in a polite manner to get more clarification. Always try to use words like, ”Please, Thank You, Brothers, and Sisters” in your communication.

Great Thanks to our Scholars (Ulemaa), who have worked extremely hard to keep Islaam ALIVE and to keep us Muslims by providing Beautiful knowledge of Islaam. BUT Scholars are NOT Allah and they might do mistakes.

You MUST always check in the Quraan and don't BLINDLY trust on Scholars, Writers, and Speakers etc. They are human being and may have made mistakes. Otherwise you may fall into the category of making the scholars your God. Be careful. Check the topic in the Quraan, what Allah is saying about, check the TRUE meaning of it. If you find any error in Scholars, Writers, Speakers etc., you must acknowledge them by telling the Scholars, Writers, Speakers etc., otherwise the misleading may go on and on and also you might be put into the category of supporters to them who have done wrong translation and Allah may punish you as well. So, don’t sit quietly and rise up to correct any misconception, it is also a Great Jihaad and you will get a Great Reward for it, Inshaa Allah.

You must also know "How to Understand the Quraan".

You must learn first and then teach others:

Prophet Muhammad (Peace Be Upon Him) said, the Best of Best among you are those, who Learns and Teaches Quraan. (Bukhari_Vol_6_Book_61_Hadith_545)

Mind Your Language: Language:

Allah does NOT love the public utterance of hurtful speech (language) unless (it be) by one to whom injustice has been done; and Allah is Hearing, Knowing. (Al_Quraan_004.148)

Anger Management:

Anxiety (Stress or Tension) hurts you, specially from the loved ones:

Anxiety is also a Weapon to heart or kill some one, even without knowing it, since it may cause dangerous diseases like blood pressure, sugar, heart attack etc. Although in this world it may be hard to prove it, BUT on the Day of Judgment Allah will sure ask about this as well. So change your attitude before it gets too late.

Anxiety occurs when both the parties disagree on some matters. It hurts you badly, if you get it from your loved ones, for others you normally don't care. Generally we do the Great Mistake that "I am Right". You must avoid the Great Mistake that "I am Right and all others are wrong", even though you are a scholar or an elder, after all you are still a human being. Usually the one who is wrong, Yells more. Stop behaving like "It’s my way or no way".

Allah has very clearly mentioned in the Quraan to AVOID Anxiety.

There is NO Compulsion in Religion..... (Al_Quraan_002:256)

Also it is not only true for the disbelievers, BUT also for the different sects that your believe is with you and my believe is with me.

"To you is your religion, and to me is my religion." (Al_Quraan_109:006)

Invite (all) to the Way of thy Lord with wisdom and beautiful preaching; and argue with them in ways that are best and most gracious: for thy Lord knoweth best, who have strayed from His Path, and who receive guidance. (Al_Quraan_016.125)

Also Remember that both Musaa (Peace Be Upon Him) and Khizr (Peace Be Upon Him) were prophets and obeyed Allah BUT disagreed on some of their mission. So we might differ in our missions to help the world, BUT our goal to obey Allah is same. You might be obeying Allah, according to what you understand and I am also obeying Allah according to what you understand. It is time to UNITE not DIVIDE.

After all we are human being and may be wrong on some point, so we need to make a very special Duaa:

O Allah! Guide us and help us. If I am wrong, O Allah! Correct me. If others are wrong, O Allah correct them. If we all are wrong, O Allah correct all of us. AMEEN.

Some Damaging things in Children who are YELLED: Don't Yell on your Child:

Look different or are different.
Are stressed / depressed all the time, which may cause blood pressure, diabetes (sugar0, heart attack, stroke etc.
Have a disability.
Struggle with daily life.
Are not good at activities.
Lack social confidence.
Are anxious.
Are unable to hold their own.

Stop Yelling on your Child and be a Role Model for your Child. Same is also true for adult as well.

Thy Lord hath decreed that ye worship none but Him, and that ye be kind to parents. Whether one or both of them attain old age in thy life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, but address them in terms of honor. (Al_Quraan_017.023)

A Muslim is the one who avoids harming Muslims with his / her Tongue and Hands..... (Sahih Bukhari - Vol-1, Book-2, Belief, Hadeeth-009). So Encourage and do NOT Discourage and apply the logics of Psychology.

On the Day when their tongues, their hands, and their feet will bear witness against them as to their actions. (Al_Quraan_024:024)

Duaa for Scholars and Students:

”Rabbi Zidnee Aailmaa”. (O my Lord! Increase me in knowledge). Ref: Al_Quraan_020.114 AMEEN.

”Rabbishrah Lee Sadree Wayassir Lee Amree Wahlul AAuqdatan Min Lisanee Yafqahoo Qawlee”. (O my Lord! expand my breast; And ease my task for me; And loose the knot from my tongue; So they may understand what I say). Ref: Al_Quraan_020.025 – 028) AMEEN.

”Rabbana Hab Lana Min Azwajina Wathurriyyatina Qurrata aAAyunin WajjAAalna Lilmuttaqeena imamaan”. (O our Lord! grant us in our wives and our offspring the joy of our eyes, and give us (the grace) to lead the righteous). Ref: Al_Quraan_025.074. AMEEN.

In Brief :::>>>

To whom Allah has given the ability to Speak, MUST start Speaking now BUT No-Violence.

To whom Allah has given the ability to go on the Media, MUST start going on to the Media now BUT No-Violence.

Violence is Hurting Islaam very BADLY.

Never Stop: Listening, Learning and Thinking.

May Allah help us to do Effective Communication, to spread Deen. AMEEN.